What Not to Do in South Korea: Etiquette and Taboos Foreigners Should Know

Most of what not to do in South Korea comes down to a few habits. Don’t start eating before the oldest person at the table, don’t hand things to someone older with one hand, and don’t stand your spoon or chopsticks upright in your rice. Nobody expects a visitor to get all of it right, but knowing these makes dinners with Korean friends or coworkers a lot more relaxed.

I’ve split this by situation, because most of these rules only come up in a few settings: at the table, when drinks are poured, on public transport, and in a handful of everyday situations.

At the Table

Leave your rice bowl on the table. In Japan or China, picking up the bowl and bringing it to your mouth is normal. In Korea, it can look a bit like you’re eating like a dog, and older relatives may notice. You eat rice and soup with the spoon while the bowls stay put. If you’re used to chopsticks-only meals, this will feel backwards for the first few dinners.

Don’t hold the spoon and chopsticks in the same hand. You’ll see Koreans switch back and forth all the time, spoon for rice and soup, chopsticks for the side dishes. They put one down before picking up the other. Holding both together in one hand isn’t done.

Never stick either one upright in your rice. It looks like the table set for an ancestral memorial ritual (jesa), where food is laid out for the dead. It’s a small gesture that can get a strong reaction, and I’ve seen older people fix it for a child without saying a word.

Wait for the oldest person to pick up their spoon. In a group with mixed ages, whoever is oldest starts, and everyone else follows. At a family dinner or a company meal, you’ll notice people hovering for a second before anyone touches the food.

Try not to be the first one to leave. Match your pace to the elders and stay until they’ve finished. Stepping out to the restroom is fine. Standing up and heading for the door while everyone is still eating is what gets noticed.

When the Drinks Come Out

Drinking rules are where the age gap shows most clearly, and they’re the ones that trip up visitors at a group dinner.

Turn your head away when you drink in front of someone older. If a senior or an older relative is at the table, you turn your body a little to the side, use your hand or your glass to cover your mouth, and drink. Between friends of the same age, most people skip this.

Use two hands. Pouring, receiving a glass, handing over a business card, passing a gift or an object to someone older all get two hands. If your hands are full, the usual workaround is to support the wrist or elbow of your pouring arm with the other hand.

Let other people pour for you, and pour for them. The custom is to fill each other’s glasses when they run low rather than pouring for yourself. Filling your own glass looks like you weren’t paying attention to the people around you. In a relaxed group of friends, people do pour their own and nobody thinks much of it, but at a work dinner I’d wait.

One practical thing: an empty glass gets refilled quickly, so if you’re done, leave it a little full. This part still bugs me a bit, because keeping track of everyone’s glass while talking is tiring, and younger Koreans complain about it as well.

On the Subway and Bus

Leave the priority seats empty. The seats marked for the elderly and people with disabilities, and the pink seats for pregnant women, are often left free even on a crowded train. You’ll see people standing in a packed carriage with the pink seat next to them empty. If you’re tired, take one of the regular seats.

Keep your voice down, and don’t take calls on speaker. People are quiet on the subway and the bus. Some talk in low voices, but loud conversation and video calls without earphones stand out. It’s a good place to keep your phone on silent.

Line up. At the subway platform, there are marks on the floor near each door, and people queue behind them and let passengers off before getting on. The same goes for buses and elevators. Pushing to the front isn’t just rude, it gets noticed.

Small Things in Everyday Life

Take off your shoes when you enter a home. That’s true for houses and apartments. It also applies to some restaurants and guesthouses, especially those with a raised floor or a shoe rack near the entrance. If you see shoes lined up at the door, that’s the signal.

Don’t write someone’s name in red ink. There’s an old superstition tying a name written in red to death, since names of the deceased were traditionally written that way. Many younger people don’t think about it, but older family members might. If you’re signing a card, use black or blue.

Point with your whole hand. Pointing at a person with one finger is considered impolite. Some people use an open palm instead. Foreigners get a lot of slack on this one, and I wouldn’t worry about it in a shop or on the street.

Skip the number 4 as a gift. The word for four (sa) sounds the same as the Chinese character for death (死). In some buildings, the elevator labels the fourth floor “F” instead of 4, or skips it. It’s not something everyone follows, but sets of four items are avoided as gifts, and you may spot the “F” in hospitals or older buildings.

Check out these related posts:

👉 What Eating Alone Actually Looks Like in Seoul

👉 Do You Tip in Korea? Why You Usually Don’t Need To

If You Do Get One Wrong

You probably will, at least once, and it’s fine. From what I’ve seen, Koreans are forgiving toward visitors who make an honest mistake and are willing to adjust. If you’re not sure, watch what the oldest person at the table does and follow along. A slightly awkward two-handed pour matters more to people than a perfect one.

The rules that come up most are about older people, whether that’s who eats first, who gets the two-handed pour, or who turns their glass away when drinking. If you remember that, the rest mostly sorts itself out.